The Greatest Things in Life Don't Have to Be Earned

Ben BeeriI built my business up to a 7 figure business. People are like, hey, look at Ben. Ben has a successful business. And I'm like, woah, woah, woah, woah, hold up. Like, we're not going to use the word successful here. Like, I am not okay with that word. I am not comfortable with that word. I haven't earned it yet. But what if what they were saying was true? The greatest things in life do not have to be earned. What is something in your life that you believe you have to earn? Like the simple things.

Like you wanting your greatest life experiences and not feeling fully worthy of them. I was walking on the beach the other day, and I was sitting there and thinking about it. That you don't actually have to earn this. Like, the beach is there. It's public. The sun sets in the background. I can watch the sunset. And the sun rises, and it sets every single day. And I get to choose if I want to be a part of that. I get to choose if I want to be there. I get to put myself in that environment anytime I decide I want to, And I don't have to earn it.

I do not have to earn it. I just have to allow it. And I was sitting there and thinking about so many other things in life that I've always felt were earned. Like, you sit there and you think of self acceptance. Like, I want to be able to accept myself, or I want other people to be able to accept me. What do I have to do to earn that? Do I have to perform a certain way? Do I have to achieve a certain accomplishment? Do I have to work really hard? Like, if I work really hard, do I now feel worthy of my own acceptance?

I know that was me for a while. Like, I know I, for the longest time, put myself in a place where I was worthy of my own acceptance if it was totally conditional. If I worked sixteen hour days, and if I didn't, I wasn't worthy of my own acceptance. And sitting there and thinking about it, the things you buy for yourself, the things you want for yourself, the places you go to, how many times do you walk into a room and you feel like you're not worthy of being in that room? You have a level of impostor syndrome. You're like everybody else is in this room. They have earned their way into this room.

That's a misconception. Sure. Is it possible they earned their way into the room? Yes. 100%. They worked hard. Right? But there's not an amount of earning you can do if you don't allow yourself to get into the room. There are plenty of rooms I earned my way into years ago that I wouldn't allow myself to walk into from a place of wholeness, and a place of feeling like I belong there. Because I just didn't allow it. It's not that I didn't earn it, I didn't allow it. And sitting there and thinking about the difference between earning and allowing.

It's like earning is short, it's a step. Right? But you'll never truly get to a place of being in the state you want to be in if you don't actually allow yourself to live it. Allowing yourself. Allowing yourself to accept yourself. Allowing yourself to love yourself. Allowing yourself to receive acceptance, to receive love from others. Respect. That's another big one. Do you allow respect from other people? Somebody gives you a compliment, can you receive it? Like, you worked really hard on something, you did something, maybe you look great in your outfit, somebody tells you how awesome you look, like can you receive the compliment from somebody?

Are you just gonna say, nah, that's my Louis Vuitton, like shirt or whatever, and it's like shift all the like weight of whatever it is that you have onto the thing. You're deflecting. You're deflecting the compliment. You don't feel worthy of it. No. I've been working out. Fuck yeah. I earned that shit. And because I earned it, now I am allowing myself to feel good about it. And feeling good about yourself is one of the things that is allowed. Like, there is not an amount of earning you can do to feel good about yourself.

To feel good about the path you're heading down in life, to feel good about your physique, to feel good about your career, to feel good about your friends, to feel good about your life. Like you can try to earn that all you want, but at a certain point in time you're going to have to shift yourself to allowing it, and allowing it to exist, and allowing it to be a reality. Because it gets to a point where there's only so much earning that you can do. We have this misconception that earning is what gives us our worth.

And there is a certain amount of earning that we do in life that moves us forward. But after a certain point in time, you get diminishing returns on whatever it is that you're earning because the next step is to allow it to exist, to allow it to be. It's like imagine you made a billion dollars tomorrow, and you're trying to earn calling yourself financially secure. If you earned another billion dollars, would you consider yourself financially secure? Or at a certain point in time, and you get to the $500,000,000 mark, and then you're like, hey, I'm going to allow myself to consider myself financially secure.

And for you it could be a different number. For many people it could be a different number. But I'm not even talking about the money part of it. Most high achievers that you see will not accept being told that they're high achievers. They will not accept being told they are successful. They will not accept being told that they're worthy and it's like, dude, you already earned this. Now you just gotta allow it. And the difference between earning and allowing is that earning is dependent on the result, and you feel like you need to go out and earn the result.

You need to go out and earn what people are going to give you. And when you allow it, you're already worthy of it, with or without the result. And what you have coming your way can come your way without requiring any additional output from you. You don't need any more output to go and watch the sunset, or walk by the beach, or be in a good conversation with a good friend. You don't have to earn being loved. You don't have to earn being accepted. You don't have to earn being respected. You don't have to earn being worthy.

You have to allow it. Like, those are things that we already have within us. And how can we bring ourselves to allow that? How can we bring ourselves to allow the greatest things in life that we have coming to us? Because they're already ours. Like there's nothing additional that is required of you to have it. And if there is something in your life that you see as this is great, I want this, I deserve this, You have to ask yourself, are you not allowing it? Like, maybe you have already earned it, but you're not allowing yourself to have it.

Like, I know for me, I built my business. I got to a place when I was 25 years old. I built my business up to a 7 figure business. People are like, hey, look at Ben. Ben has a successful business. And I'm like, woah, woah, woah, woah, hold up. Like, we're not going to use the word successful here. Like, I'm not okay with that word. I am not comfortable with that word. And, oh, here's Ben, he's doing well. I'm not okay with that. Ben is not doing well. And, I would almost sit there and argue against what people were saying about me positively, because I hadn't built up the self worth to allow it to land.

I had to tell people like, nope, I can't accept you saying that. I haven't earned it yet. But what if what they were saying was true? Like, what if all I had to do was just allow it? Like, hey, Ben. You've been doing a really good job recently. The stuff you're saying is inspiring to me. Thank you. And that was hard for me. I remember I received a text message probably around the time when I first started the podcast, and few some people have listened to a few episodes, and they're like, Ben, what you said inspired me. I really appreciate that.

And that was a difficult thing for me to read and hear because I didn't fully accept it yet or allow it yet. But then I realized it's like, that's the point. That's the point. I get to learn on this journey with you guys. Like, I get to learn the things that I'm working on, the things that I'm working on accepting and allowing, and I can share with you guys things that I'm learning along the way. And if you guys have something to say to me, I need to allow it. Like, I can allow it. Like, if you want to say something good to me, that's been difficult for me. Like, I'm not used to hearing good things that are said to me.

That goes back to childhood. And it's like all of a sudden, as an adult, it's like, Ben, you're doing well in business. Ben, I like your podcast. Ben, you're kicking ass. You're swimming. You're about to get to a million yards. What if I didn't defend it? Like, what if I didn't say, hey, getting to a million yards, like, not worthy until I get to 2,000,000 yards. I'm not worthy until I have an 8 figure business. I'm not worthy until everybody in the room acknowledges me. I'm not worthy until the room is mine.

What if I am worthy before any of that stuff? Like, what if I'm worthy at yard zero and I swim the million yards because I am worthy of it. What if it doesn't matter how much revenue my business is bringing in? I'm worthy regardless. Because I'm worthy, because I'm allowing my business to express myself, that's why I can continue to grow my business. Because I'm expressing myself here on my podcast. Like, that's why I can grow the podcast. But that's why I can receive a compliment, because I'm already worthy of it.

And to sit there and to think about that mindset shift, and it's like, it doesn't actually have to be earned. Like, some things in life do not have to be earned. And I don't have to deflect them. I don't have to defend against them. I can simply allow it. I can simply allow myself, after a long day of work, to go and walk by the beach, take in the fresh air, look at the ocean, Look at the kids running around and throwing a football around, having fun. There's a sunset in the background. Take a look at it.

The sunset is something that is one of the most beautiful things that we will ever see in our lifetime. The skies are clear, you get to see it once a day. That's one of the greatest things you'll ever see. And the greatest things in life don't have to be earned. You just gotta allow them.